where have all my hours of sleep gone?

i haven't slept for a full night in god knows how long.. i'm starting to wonder if there's something seriously wrong with that. maybe it's just summer. maybe it's just that i'm a robot. or maybe i'm retarded.
i've been listening to the same six cd's all summer and the future doesn't look too good from here. oh well. i miss john. life is empty without him. (where are you john?) duh. i'm getting excited about the show on the first. i have no idea how it will turn out. hopefully wonderful because i love accoustic guitars in the moonlight. not to mention the smell of a bonfire. and michael, even though i'm tough on her.
matt says i'm tough on my friends. he's right. i mean well. i just don't want them to slip up and wreck things for themselves. who am i though, right...... dear lord i sound like ******. i'm through.